Alec was starving, and Tanner said he was, too, and that he knew just the place to go. “You like ribs?”
“Oh, yeah.”
“Great. This place stays open late on game nights for Angels’ fans leaving the stadium. We’ll go there. I eat there at least once a week. I’m sure I can get us in.”
Tanner made a quick phone call then drove them to a place not far from the stadium with a flashing sign that read Ribs ‘n Brisket. The place was full of people, many of them wearing Angels’ gear, with a fairly long line waiting for tables. Tanner spoke to the young girl at the greeter’s station. She smiled when she saw him and told him she was holding a table for him. Alec noted the smile and grinned. He realized if Tanner were straight, he’d have no problem finding partners—probably a different one every day of the week.
The ribs were perfect, and so was the company. Tanner seemed loose and carefree, more talkative than he’d been before, and everything was new and exciting for Alec. Stuffed from downing a full rack of ribs with fries, Alec turned down the gelato that Tanner gushed was the best in the world. He drove them to his hotel. The team had provided him with a free rental car, which was being donated by one of the team’s sponsors.
Alec was impressed by all of it. At the same time, he knew that doing what Tanner was doing, living a big life but out in the world by himself, was something he wasn’t ready for yet. Alec’s life at the moment was perfect for him. Being here with Tanner was great, but so would be returning to Portland and his dad after spending tomorrow with Tanner.
The boys he knew best at school, mostly 15-year-olds now, were talking about how their dads and moms were holding them back, were too restrictive. Most boys their age wanted more independence. Alec didn’t feel that way. Maybe it was because his dad was easygoing and not at all strict with him, or maybe, Alec thought, because he’d lost his mother and was very close to the one parent he had left. He wasn’t in any hurry to gain even more independence if it meant more separation from his dad.
Tanner was living in a suite at the top of his nearby hotel. “The team pays for it,” he told Alec. “It’s in the contract the league signed with the union, I think. Teams have to supply housing for players like me. I don’t know if the Angels have to be quite as generous as this—” he gestured with his arm at the suite “—but I think they see me as a future asset and want me to be happy; if I am, they think their chances of a long-term contract with me will be pretty good. Pitchers, especially starters, are a valuable commodity.”
Alec looked around the suite. It was very luxurious with a central lounging room, an eating area, a small kitchen and two bedrooms, each with its own en-suite bathroom, all furnished with expensive fittings including original art on the walls, thick carpeting and comfortable furniture.
He’d been wondering what the sleeping arrangements were going to be. That had led him to some confusing thoughts. He wasn’t sure what he felt now that he’d seen there were two beds. Had he wanted there to be no choice, that there’d be just one bed so where he’d sleep would not be open to discussion? Now he could have his own bed if he wanted it. But he was unsure what that choice should be. Dammit!
He needed to figure this out! He knew he was attracted to Tanner, though it wasn’t really a romantic crush. He knew Tanner was gay. But he also knew Tanner was enough older than he was—just barely, but enough—that it was like he was a young man and Alec was still a boy. Tanner wasn’t old enough realistically to have found a life partner; he was at an age where he should be playing the field, trying out different guys.
And Alec certainly wasn’t looking at Tanner as someone to fool around with as he’d done with Leo. Even if for some reason he could envision him as just a sex partner, the fact was, Tanner lived a thousand miles from him, and to Alec, he was simply a great friend.
Okay, so this was thinking about the future. He needed to figure out tonight and tomorrow night. Was he happy or disappointed that there were two beds here? Or more directly, did he want to have sex with Tanner while he was here?
His body was telling him yes: sex, and the more the better. His mind, his personality, his nature, were all telling him to be cautious, to hold back. Telling him he wasn’t ready for all that would go with having sex with Tanner. Telling him their relationship wouldn’t be the same if he slept with him.
Screw that, he said to himself, fighting his rational side. He’d had sex with Leo. Leo was older than Alec. Okay, just a little older, but he’d had no problem with that once he’d done it, and he knew instinctively that he’d never have a long-term relationship with Leo. They were too different. And while he was more in tune with Tanner’s personality, Tanner was older. So, this was his dilemma: should he or shouldn’t he let Tanner know he was available?
Dammit! He just wasn’t sure!
He and Tanner were too different to be boyfriends. But could he have sex with him as he’d done with Leo? Was there any reason he shouldn’t? Boys his age experimented all the time. He had with Leo and loved it. He’d probably do it again with Leo.
But Leo was a happy-go-lucky guy. Sex with him wouldn’t be anything more than another notch on his well-defaced bedpost. It would be different with Tanner. Tanner was older, but he also seemed much more sensitive, more mature, and yet perhaps more fragile. Totally different from Leo.
And it occurred to Alec that this wasn’t just his choice. Tanner might not want to do anything with him for who knew what reasons. Maybe that was the way to decide. If Tanner wanted to fool around with him, what then? Should he say yes or no?
He decided he’d cross that bridge when he came to it. First, he should tell him he, too, was gay. But that wasn’t something to blurt out. The time had to be right. He’d just have to wait for the appropriate time. He was sure that would come.
It was late and certainly time for bed. They had a big day planned for tomorrow: Disneyland! Tanner didn’t have to be at the ballpark till 5:45 tomorrow afternoon. They had the whole day to enjoy the amusement park.
Alec decided he should leave the sleeping arrangements to Tanner. He was older, he was the host, and why should Alec be the one to start talking about sex? That might be the furthest thing from Tanner’s mind.
So, as they were sitting on the couch in the living space of the suite, looking out the huge glass window at the lights of the city and the traffic still heavy in both directions on the I-5 freeway, Alec let Tanner take the lead.
They chatted for just a few minutes, and then Tanner ordered chocolate sundaes from room service. They came five minutes later, and both boys dug in.
Eventually, with the sundaes disposed of, Tanner said, “You must be exhausted, Alec. Want to go to bed?”
“Yeah, I am beat. I liked being the batboy, but there was a lot of pressure, too. That’s my fault: I try too hard never to screw anything up. It’s embarrassing if I do, and embarrassment is something I don’t do well. I tend to pull back into a shell when I screw up. Something new like being in that dugout with responsibilities, it went fine, and I liked it, but yeah, I’m beat. Happy, too.”
“Okay, I’m ready, too. Do you want to sleep in separate beds? I’d love it if we slept together.”
Damn! Tanner was letting Alec decide. And he was still torn.
Okay, decision time. Alec, ready or not, knew it was time.
“Let’s talk about that, okay? First, I need to tell you something. This is hard, but I’ll just say it. I’m gay. I didn’t tell you when you outed yourself to me because, well, I’m not out to anyone but my dad; this is a big step, telling someone else. I’d only met you back then and didn’t really know you at all. Still, right from the beginning, I liked you. A lot. I thought we could be great friends except that you’re here, and I’m there.”
“You’re gay? Really?”
“Yes. And that complicates the bed I sleep in. I’d like to sleep with you, but I’m unsure about it being more than sleeping. Part of me wants it to be more, but then I keep thinking of reasons why we shouldn’t. I guess I don’t know what I want.”
“Wow! I like you, too, but never thought about you and sex. Well, that isn’t entirely true. You’re awfully good-looking and if you were even one year older, I’d have been drooling over you. But you are too young for me, both legally and morally. But then, I’ve never had sex with anyone, and, well, I’d sure like to.”
“I’ve only had sex once with a guy, and all we did was stroke each other off in the shower,” Alec said. “It was wonderful, and I still get chills remembering it. With you, it would be different, because I have much stronger feelings for you. About the only thing I have in common with him is liking sex. With you, it’s your personality and just who you are, how you are. Even though you’re older, I feel we have a lot in common. Sex with you might enhance that or maybe make us uncomfortable with each other. That uncertainty makes me confused and is why I don’t know what I want.”
Alec had both been looking at Tanner and looking away while saying this. Now, he held his eyes. “I do know that the possibility of sex isn’t the major reason why I like you. But this is all new to me, and it’s sort of like I’m learning as I go. For instance, because I’m gay, is that why I think about sex with every male I see? I do that. And I do it with you. But going through with sex with everyone? That’s different. I’m just so uncertain. I want to try that with you, and I don’t, too.” Then he dropped his eyes, and it hit him just how tired he was.
“Is this what irony is?” Tanner asked. “Two guys who want to have sex, yet can think of all the reasons not to? And here we are together. I don’t have answers, either. I also want to but am worried about how it might affect our friendship, just like you said.”
Neither spoke for a moment or two, just looking at each other. Finally, Alec said, “I have an idea. Just an idea, not even a suggestion. An idea. But, well, I like the idea of sleeping with you a lot. Like two friends having a sleepover. But if we do that, I’m pretty sure our hormones will take over and we’ll have some sort of sex, which both of us have reservations about, and maybe ramifications afterwards, too. So, here’s the idea. Just a thought. We could take a shower together, and I could show you what my friend and I did. Then you and I would be in the same place, and you could never say again you were a total virgin when it came to having any sort of sex with another guy. And we could share your bed afterward and not worry about having sex there.”
The smile on Tanner’s face spoke more loudly than any words he might have said. He didn’t speak at all, though. He just stood up and stretched his hand out to Alec, who took it and allowed himself to be pulled up off the couch. Then they walked hand in hand into Tanner’s bedroom.
There, Tanner started to undress. Alec did, too. Tanner said, “You know, this is only fitting. I’m older than you and shouldn’t be more naive than you about this stuff. This’ll just catch me up with you.”
Alec was sure he was joking, maybe teasing, probably to relieve the tension that they both felt. He knew his heart was beating much faster than normal. He joked back. “Nope. You’ll still be one behind me. You’ll need to find a gay teammate to catch up with.”
“You know, that’s possible,” Tanner said, no longer joking. “In the minors, players on the road share a hotel room, and there have to be some gay players out there. I’m certain to be sent down after this season. Maybe I can get lucky then.”
They were both aroused when their last clothing had hit the floor. Tanner seemed more embarrassed than Alec, which again reminded Alec of how much Tanner seemed to have a lot of teenager still in him. Like he never got to do the things he wanted to do back then and was still trying to experience them now.
The shower was a large stall with multiple shower heads, both above and on the sides. The water was hot almost immediately, and Alec had a quick thought that this was a pretty great way to live. Room service, great lodgings, all the amenities, and someone else was picking up the tab.
Then he stopped thinking about anything but Tanner, who seemed very tentative, as if he had no idea what to do, what was allowed and what was over the top.
Alec took the lead. He’d done this before and felt confident. He soaped up his hand and started washing Tanner’s front, top to bottom to top, re-soaping frequently. He skipped his genitals the first time down, but not the first time up. He worked on the good stuff till Tanner was squirming, then moved up beyond. When he was at Tanner’s shoulders, he said, “Turn around,” and then was working on his back again. This time, though, his touch was light and sensuous. He began doing arpeggios on Tanner’s back, lightly touching, just encouraging the nerve endings that seemed to be highly sensitive at the moment. Then he reached around with his other hand and took Tanner’s erection in his hand.
He stroked it so loosely that Tanner started wiggling, trying to make firmer contact. Alec only kept the teasing up briefly, then stopped the finger play on Tanner’s back and reached around with that hand and cupped his scrotum.
Then he tightened his grip but now kept the strokes very slow and deliberate. When he heard Tanner’s breathing become raspy, he moved his hand from his scrotum up so he could tickle the end of Tanner’s cock as he continued stroking.
Then he sped up, and Tanner let out a gargling sound and exploded.
Alec eased his stroking, stayed off the crown, just brushing the rim, and continued till Tanner’s body language told him he was done.
Tanner didn’t almost collapse as Alec had his first time. Alec didn’t know if he would or wouldn’t and so put his arm around him just in case. It took Tanner about a minute before he could speak.
“That’s what I’ve been missing? I didn’t know it could be that good.”
Alec grinned. “I must have hidden talents.”
“God, if you were any better, you’d have killed me. And now, it’s my turn to do you!”
Alec was more than ready. Tanner was a newbie and still coming down from his high, but even with his lack of subtlety, Alec enjoyed the moment. All the time, he was aware it was Tanner who was doing this, and that added to the pleasure he was experiencing.
He slept in Tanner’s bed, naked of course, and at first Tanner spooned him before eventually trading places. Alec found he much preferred holding Tanner from behind him rather than being held. Once they joined that way, Alec was asleep in minutes.
They breakfasted in the suite; Tanner told Alec he most always did it this way. Over eggs, bacon and toast, Tanner said, “That was super last night! I’ve been needing something like that. I have to find a partner!”
“I liked it, too,” Alec said, “and I want a boyfriend. I like the physical stuff, but I want someone to love. I realized last night that you’re a man, and I’m a boy. I’m glad we did what we did, but back home I want to find someone my age. I want more than sex with him. I want a great friend and partner. Other boys have that; I want it, too.”
“You won’t have it as hard as I will,” Tanner said. “I have to keep it secret, and there’s press around the team all the time.”
“And you’re recognizable, too, because you’ve had picture in the paper so often. Yeah, I don’t know how you’re going to find someone. Well, maybe I do! You need to find someone like you had in high school! What do they call it, a beard?”
“I guess that makes sense. I’ll have to work on it. But I’m desperate. You showed me what I’m missing. And I like what you said; I want closeness—intimacy, I think it’s called—too.”
They finished breakfast and Tanner called the Public Relations number for the Angels and talked to someone there about getting a VIP badge for Disneyland. He told them he wanted it for that day, for himself and a friend.
“All set,” he told Alec after disconnecting. “They’ll have the credential sent to the front desk here in about fifteen minutes. Just time to shower and head out.”
They did that, but they showered separately without even discussing it. Alec found that both humorous and a little sad. He realized what he’d felt—that the age difference between them was too great—was shared by Tanner. He was sure they’d remain very good friends, but was certain they’d never have sex together again.
Tanner picked up his VIP credentials from the front desk and drove them the short distance to Disneyland. They had preferential parking, and they entered the park through a private entrance. They met a guide who offered to go through the park with them or said they could go on their own, which was the option they chose. He told them how to avoid the long waiting lines for every ride in the park, Tanner thanked him, and the two were on their way.
There were already long lines for the most popular attractions, but each had a private entrance so the lines could be avoided. Alec felt a little guilty bypassing all the people waiting, but this seemed a once-in-a-lifetime treat, and he wasn’t delaying the people waiting by more than a minute or so. They wanted the thrilling attractions more than the scenic ones and so chose the Matterhorn Bobsleds, the Indiana Jones Adventure, Space Mountain, Incredicoaster, and Guardians of the Galaxy—Mission Breakout!
After enjoying those, they wandered around the park, mostly just sightseeing. They had lunch at the Black Tap Craft Burgers & Shakes.
After that, Alec wanted to see the Haunted Mansion, and they did that. Then it was more walking. They were very comfortable with each other. Alec had been very aware of Tanner’s age when they were showering together. Now, just being friends, that age difference seemed to disappear. Tanner was still a teenager at heart, and Alec was more mature than many boys his age.
While they were wandering, Alec spotted a boy who appeared to be about seven or eight, standing by himself near the gate to Adventureland. He was crying. He pointed him out to Tanner and said they should see what the problem was.
They approached the boy, and Alec got down on one knee to talk to him so he wasn’t towering over him.
“Are you lost?” Alec asked him.
The boy nodded.
“Okay, we’re here to help. Tell me your name, and I’ll have it announced over the loudspeakers. Are you here with your family?”
“My parents,” the boy said. “I’m Freddie Chambers.”
“I’ll bet they’re more scared than you are,” Alec told him. Then he asked Tanner if he could get hold of one of the park attendants and have it announced that Freddie Chambers would like his parents to meet him by the Adventureland gate ASAP. Meanwhile, he would stay with Freddie.
Tanner left to do as he’d been asked, and Alec assured Freddie his parents would come get him soon and that he’d not leave him while they were waiting.
The announcement was made, and Alec had Freddie listen to it. “That’ll bring them running,” Alec said. “How did you get separated from them?”
“I don’t know. They were arguing and I saw the building for the Jungle Cruise that Mom had said we’d go on, and I walked in that direction to see it better, but when I turned around, they weren’t there!”
Saying that brought back memory of the fear he’d experienced, and he began crying again.
Alec put his arm around him and said, “They’ll be here really fast now. Let’s look for them.”
Freddie stopped crying and began studying the crowd, then smiled and yelled, “Mom!” He took off running, and a woman grabbed him and swung him around in a circle.
Tanner came back just as that was happening. Alec said, “Let’s vamoose.”
“Huh? Why?”
“I don’t want to spend the next ten minutes being thanked. Let’s go.” He began walking away, his back turned to where Freddie was.
Tanner hurried to keep up with him, laughing.
“What?”
“You really like to be in the background, don’t you? You do things for people but don’t want to make a big deal about it.”
“Hey, you’re used to thousands of people cheering for you. I don’t need or even want that kind of attention. Makes me feel uncomfortable. Besides which, I’m doing this for you.”
“Huh?”
Alec tried to keep the teasing drollery from his voice. “Can’t you see it? Freddie’s dad would recognize you, and tomorrow’s headline in the LA Times would read: Baseball Prodigy Saves Boy at Disneyland! Your teammates would tease the snot out of you in the dugout, make you take a bow to the crowd, tip your hat while laughing all the time. Maybe they’d hand you a life-sized doll wrapped in a blanket to hold. You’d never live it down.”
Tanner gave him a suspicious look. Sarcastically, then: “Well, you could be right. So, oops. Thank you.”
Alec just grinned.
They stayed at the park till five in the afternoon. Then Tanner drove to the stadium, and Alec took a taxi to John Wayne Airport. They’d decided saying goodbye this way was easier than in airport traffic. Both had sad eyes when parting. Tanner was amazed at how fond of Alec he’d become, and, to Alec, Tanner was the big brother he’d always wished he’d had. He’d miss talking to him. They would continue texting.
Alec had a seven o’clock flight on Alaska Airlines. He had plenty of time and had dinner at the airport, boarded when his flight was called, and found his dad’s car waiting for him outside baggage claim at Portland International.
Posted March 15 2025