Second Chances

Chapter 36

A mixture of excitement and trepidation crossed Alex’s mind. Nervous, he hesitated for a few minutes before he began to listen to the voicemails.

“Hi, Alex. Rats, I was hoping to get you rather than your voicemail.

“There are a couple things I want to talk to you about. First, I see you left me several voice mail messages on Monday and Tuesday, and sent quite a few text messages, too. By the way, I’m so happy for you that you’ve now officially got your job back, and that those two women are gone! That was great news!

“I’m really sorry, though, that I didn’t get back to you before now. I got a call from my mom right after I got to work Monday morning. She told me that my dad apparently had a stroke and had been taken to hospital. Well, I panicked. I told my boss that I had an emergency. I stopped by my apartment, threw a few things together, then hauled ass to Kansas. In the process, I forgot my phone at home. I’m not addicted to my phone like you are, so I didn’t even realize I didn’t have it until after I’d gotten to the hospital.

“Anyway, they got my dad stabilized at the Pratt Hospital, then they took him by ambulance to one of the big hospitals in Wichita on Tuesday. I guess they figured out fairly quickly that he hadn’t had a stroke but were unsure of what had happened. They ran a bunch of tests on him, and it turned out that he had an overactive thyroid, of all things. Apparently, the paralysis he was experiencing wasn’t a stroke symptom after all, but a side effect of the thyroid issue. He also had a racing heart when they took him to the hospital. It turns out he’d had some other symptoms that hadn’t seemed like a big concern to him, like an unexplained weight loss over the past couple months. Anyway, it sounds like his thyroid condition can be regulated with medicine and diet. That was such a relief to hear.

“He's doing fine now and is back home. Once things settled down a bit with my dad, I tried calling from my parent’s house, but only got your voicemail. And you know my parents are the last people on earth without mobile phones, so I wasn’t able to text. And I really didn’t want to leave a voicemail, though I’ve obviously ended up doing just that.

“Anyway, I stayed until this morning to make sure he was doing alright. I also had some thinking to do about other things as well. I took my time in Pratt as an opportunity to think things over, without all the distractions I’d have at home. And that…” Jesse’s message ended mid-sentence.

A whole range of emotions crossed Alex’s mind. He was relieved, of course, that Jesse’s sudden radio silence had nothing at all to do with Ryan. He was shocked when he heard that Jesse’s dad had suffered a stroke, but was happy for Alan, Betty, and Jesse when it seemed that Alan’s health problem wasn’t a stroke after all but was something that wouldn’t leave any lasting damage and could be regulated with diet and medicine.

Then, it seemed that he’d overreacted when he was unable to contact Jesse, assuming the only possible reason Jesse hadn’t replied was because of Ryan. That made Alex feel foolish. First, he’d unnecessarily put himself through quite a bit of agony. Then he’d fallen apart, dragging several of his friends into his emotional hell. Rhys, Ian, Andrew, and Robbie had all thought it odd that Jesse had suddenly disappeared without explanation. After all, they also were unable to reach him, too. If Jesse had been ignoring Alex’s messages and texts, he was ignoring everyone’s. Alex had gone to pieces, assuming the cause for Jesse’s sudden disappearance was one thing, when it turned out to be something else altogether. Alex had quickly assumed the worst, that Jesse had left him for Ryan, and completely ignored that there could possibly be a different explanation altogether.

Alex was able to breathe a sigh of relief. He made his way through Pittsburgh to Moon Township where the airport was located, a smile on his face seemingly the entire way. He pulled into the garage, where he returned his rental car. He retrieved his luggage, then walked into the terminal. He checked to see what gate his flight was departing from, then made his way through security and hopped onto the train that would take him to the departure gates.

Once he reached the gate, Alex found an empty seat, then plunked his overnight bag down on the floor and his messenger bag on the adjacent seat. He leaned back and closed his eyes. He chided himself for being so foolish but was elated that he’d been wrong. He’d be embarrassed when the time came to explain to his friends that everything was alright, for sure. But they’d be happy for Alex regardless. They’d forgive his stupidity, just like they had in times past. Once again, they’d overlook one of his many character flaws, and in return would give Alex nothing but kindness, love, and understanding. Jesse would be upset with Alex, so he wouldn’t voice it out loud, but he really knew deep down that his friends were more, much more than he deserved.

Once his eyes were closed, Alex realized how tired he was. He’d not slept well for the past three nights, and that exhaustion was finally catching up to him. Several times, Alex began to nod off. However, every time he began to slip into the welcoming arms of sleep, he’d be jarred awake as one announcement or another was made throughout the airport.

“John Kelso, party of two, please step up to the podium at Gate 31…”

“Sherry Ziebell, please pick up the white courtesy phone…”

“This is the final call for Flight 1318 to Phoenix. All ticketed passengers should make their way to Gate 55 for immediate departure of their flight. The doors will close in two minutes and will not reopen…”

After Alex’s rest had been interrupted several times, he heard that his own flight was ‘pre-boarding,’ and that passengers were allowed one carry-on and one personal item. Only then did he recall that Jesse had left a second message. He pulled his phone from his pocket and put it to his ear.

“Hi, Alex, me again. Sorry, the message I was leaving was too long, and I got cut off. So, here’s part two. The next thing I need to discuss with you, and I know I probably should’ve talked to you about this before now, but I didn’t want to freak you out. I was nervous about what you’d say, so I chickened out. Ryan tried calling me several times last week. Each time I saw it was him, I ignored the call. Well, on Sunday evening, he went into work and called me from his work number. I answered when I didn’t recognize the number.

“So, anyway, we talked for several minutes on the phone. Then he convinced me to meet him for a drink that evening, so we could talk in person. He and I talked for quite a while. He told me that he’s a changed person, Alex. And he told me how much he missed me and wanted to get back together with me. He wanted a second chance. Of course, I was skeptical. But he’s got such a way about him, you know? He’s charismatic yet very down to earth at the same time. I told him I had to…”

“Your attention, please. We are ready to begin boarding Flight 772 to Detroit.”

“…getting back with him, okay?”

“Continuing…”

“…leaving you!”

“…continuing service to Salt Lake City, Utah, here at gate 46. Zone One, you may now board at this time.”

“…getting back together with me...”

“We are currently only boarding Zone One.”

“…go out with him Friday…”

“Please check the zone number on your boarding pass and board only when your zone is called.”

“…to The Ranch for karaoke night.”

“Standby passengers, please consult the monitors in the gate area for your seating assignment.”

“…be on a date…”

“Zone Two, welcome aboard.”

“…we’re an item once again…”

“Families traveling with small children, you may also board at this time, along with Zone Two. Members of the armed forces who are in uniform, as well as retired members of the military with proper identification, may also board at this time. Thank you for your service.”

“…you and I won’t be going to dinner on Friday or going to The Ranch together. That being said, it’s critical that you come to The Ranch. I mean, imperative. Please promise me that you will be…”

“Zones One, Two, and Three may now board.”

“…I have to do this, Alex. I hope you understand. Just remember that I love you, and always will.”

Alex was stunned. After the first voicemail, he thought everything between Jesse and him was fine. He’d been lured into a false sense of security, so to speak. He was not ready for Jesse’s words in the second voicemail. Staring unseeingly forward, Alex dropped the phone into his lap. A woman who’d been sitting across from Alex looked up from the book she was reading and gave him a strange look. Alex did not notice her look of confusion.

Several minutes later, Alex felt a hand gently shake his shoulder. “Sir,” he heard, “Sir, you’re on the flight to Detroit, correct?”

Still staring forward, Alex simply nodded.

“Everyone else on the flight has already boarded.” The gate agent, with her hand still on Alex’s shoulder, then asked, “Is everything alright?”

Again, Alex simply nodded in response.

“If everything is alright, then, sir, could you please come with me?”

Staring forward, Alex stood, the phone falling from his lap to the floor. Without even looking to the floor, he bent down, felt around for a few seconds until he located his phone, then picked it up. He stood back up and stuffed his phone into a back pocket, took his messenger bag off the adjacent seat and slung it over his neck, then began to walk towards the gate.

“Sir, is that your bag?” the gate agent asked.

Alex turned back to where he’d just been seated and, seeing his carry-on next to the seat, he quietly replied “Yes.” He stepped over to the bag and retrieved it from the floor.

The gate agent returned to the jet bridge doorway. Alex followed her, then set down his carry-on so he could pull up his boarding pass on his phone. As the gate agent scanned the boarding pass, she again asked, “Sir, are you sure you’re feeling alright?”

Alex nodded. Though not fully convinced, she allowed Alex to board the flight to Detroit.

-----

Alex’s flight was delayed leaving Detroit. He didn’t get back to his house until the wee hours of Friday morning. Still stunned at the news that Jesse was back with Ryan, he simply dropped his messenger bag and suitcase on the floor in the kitchen when he walked in from the garage. He walked upstairs to his bedroom, where he pulled off most of his clothes, then flopped onto the bed.

Knowing that sleep would not come, Alex spent the next several hours staring at the ceiling, unsure of where life would lead him now. He thought he’d gotten his second chance at love. Well, he did get a second chance, but apparently, he’d blown it. ‘Just one more failure in a string of failures that seem to have become the story of Alex,’ he thought to himself. He didn’t cry, though. He’d cried himself out earlier in the week.

At some point, Alex had fallen into a restless sleep. When he awoke, filtered sun was peeking through the locust tree in the back yard, shining down through the window and onto Alex’s bed. Alex glanced at the clock. It was ten minutes to two. Charlotte had left for her summer job at some point in the morning; Cameron likely left only a few minutes prior to Alex awakening.

Alex sat up, then reached for his mobile phone which was sitting on the nightstand. He saw that he had several missed phone calls, two from work, one from Rhys, one from Andrew, one from Robbie, and…two from Jesse. ‘Why on earth would Jesse have called me again?’ he thought to himself. ‘He’d made it pretty clear that we were through and he’s back with Ryan.’ Alex glanced at his phone again. They were just missed calls. Jesse hadn’t left any additional voicemails. He quickly texted Carrie to explain his absence, letting her know that he’d gotten in late, and had just awoken.

Alex dragged himself downstairs where he retrieved his overnight bag. He lugged it upstairs, then set it down on the bed. He emptied the bag, first throwing dirty clothes in the hamper, then taking pretty much everything else into the bathroom. He shaved and brushed his teeth, something he’d failed to do the night before.

He returned downstairs, where he made himself a peanut butter sandwich and poured himself a glass of milk. He didn’t feel much like eating, but Alex knew he was hungry. He hadn’t had anything substantive to eat in well over 24 hours. Once he’d finished his sandwich and milk, he dug around in the fridge and pulled out a plastic container of cut-up pineapple. He began to eat the pineapple directly from the container. He was shocked when, sometime later, he discovered that he’d eaten the entire contents of the container, well over a pound of pineapple. ‘Well, I guess you-know-what will be nice and sweet,’ he thought to himself. ‘Not that anyone will find out.’

When Alex glanced at his watch, he discovered it was already past four. He decided he wanted to let a few of his friends know what had happened. Thinking some of them were likely still at work, he decided first to give Robbie a call, as Alex knew his schedule was flexible. They talked for a while, Robbie all but refusing to believe that Alex and Jesse were over as a couple. Robbie told Alex that he and Andrew would be at The Ranch that evening to support Alex with what would surely be a tough pill to swallow, seeing Jesse, the man he loved, accompanied by his new man, Ryan.

After he’d hung up with Robbie, he texted Rhys, asking him to call when he had the chance. Alex’s phone rang not a minute later. Alex repeated the story he’d shared with Robbie. While Robbie’s reaction was one of surprise and disbelief, Rhys’ reaction was anger. “When I see Jesse next, he is going to get one hell of an ass-chewing! He needs a good, swift kick in the ass!” Rhys told Alex.

“No,” replied Alex, “you’re going to see him tonight. Please don’t make a scene. I think that will just make everything worse. I’m just going to have to find a way to get over it, Rhys. I don’t know how, but I will. I have to.”

Rhys called Alex back not two minutes after they’d disconnected, this time using his work phone. “I think you’re going to have a lot of support tonight,” Rhys told Alex. “I got a group text from Robbie while we were talking. Robbie told the group briefly what had happened and asked everyone to come and give you moral support. There’ve been several responses already…Eli, Sean, uhh, let’s see, Riley, Sam, Anthony, Ben…they’ve all replied saying they’ll be there tonight. I think there’s going to be one hell of a crowd to support you! And you know Ian and I will be there as well.”

“Gosh,” said Alex, “that’s so kind of everyone.”

“Thank Robbie when you see him tonight. He’s the one who put out the call to arms.”

“I’ll most definitely thank him.”

“You’re not planning on singing tonight, are you?” asked Rhys.

“Yeah, actually, I am planning on it,” replied Alex.

“Are you sure that’s wise?”

“My mind is made up, Rhys. I’m singing tonight. Period.”

“Okay, if you think you should,” said Rhys. “Ian and I will be by to pick you up about six. We’re taking you to dinner before heading to The Ranch.”

-----

When they arrived at The Ranch, they discovered that, as usual, Matt was already there, and that he’d reserved three tables down front, rather than the usual two. Several of Alex’s new friends made their way into the venue over the next fifteen minutes. They all made a point to exchange a few words of encouragement with Alex. Alex was surprised when Ben walked up to him.

“Hey, Ben, how’s it going?” Alex said, a forced smile on his face.

“I’m doing okay, Alex. More importantly, how are you doing?”

“Surviving.”

“When I heard the news that Jesse was going back to his ex, I was completely shocked,” said Ben. Alex nodded in agreement. “I thought you two were perfect for one another, y’know?” Ben hesitated before he continued, “I…I…don’t even know if I should even mention this, Alex. You know how I’ve said in the past that I wasn’t interested in a relationship? After watching you and Jesse, I was rethinking my opinion on long-term relationships. I found I was a bit envious of what you two had. I was considering the possibility of at least exploring getting into a long-term relationship. You know, settling down and all. I’m thinking now that maybe I had the right opinion all along, though. Relationships are just not worth it.”

“Ben,” commented Alex, “first off, please don’t let what’s happened between Jesse and me be the determining factor regarding your attitude towards relationships. I’d really like to encourage you to at least not dismiss a relationship out of hand.”

“Despite what’s happened to you?” asked Ben.

“Despite what’s happened to me.”

The two were quiet for a few seconds before Alex continued. “Ben, one day you’re going to wake up to find that you no longer are up to cruising. Maybe not for several years, but it’s going to happen. Really, the only reason I stopped was that I was, well, getting both old and fat. I knew I was going to be rejected more and more, and that’s something I dreaded. If it wasn’t for that, I might still be carrying on as I had when we first met up. But if I had, I wouldn’t have gotten together with this group. I’m sure I never would’ve gotten with Jesse. And despite that relationship coming to an end, I would’ve missed out on one of the best, well, nine months or so, of my life. Yeah, it hurts now. But would I change anything? Would I give up the last nine months just so I didn’t hurt so much right now? No. Emphatically, no.”

“I guess that gives me a little more to think about,” Ben responded, before the two again fell quiet.

Alex was just about to ask Rhys if he’d head to the bar for him when Ben again spoke. “My offer still stands, Alex.”

“You mean…” Alex began to reply when he saw Ben nod affirmatively with a smile on his face. Though it was clearly forced, Alex returned the smile, then commented, “I haven’t forgotten, Ben, believe me. But I think it’s going to be awhile before I’m up to getting with another guy.”

Ben excused himself and returned to his seat. Alex took out his debit card and handed it to Rhys. “Rhys, could you please get me a shot and a beer.”

Rhys reached for the debit card, but Alex pulled it away. “And Rhys,” Alex said, “You think I don’t realize that you and Jesse always buy me my drinks here, but I caught on to that one pretty quickly. Just use my debit card, not yours, tonight, okay?” Alex again extended his hand, offering the debit card to Rhys.

A guilty smile crept across Rhys’ face. “Damn it,” he chuckled. “I thought for sure…ah, never mind.” He snatched the card from Alex’s hand. Alex laughed to himself.

Rhys had just reached the bar when Ian noticed two new arrivals. “Don’t look now, but here’s Jesse with, I guess, his new old man.” Despite Ian’s words, Alex and his friends turned en masse toward the door. They watched Jesse lead Ryan through the warren of tables to a small table directly behind his friends. Once they reached the table, Alex’s friends turned away. The message was clear. They had all chosen sides. They were all firmly in Alex’s camp.

Alex, however, wistfully continued to watch Jesse and Ryan for several seconds before also turning away. ‘Damn it,’ he chided himself, ‘I wasn’t going to cry!’ He took off his glasses to wipe both eyes with his hand.

Jesse seemed surprised when his friends all turned away when he and Ryan sat down. Alex noticed, however, that Jesse couldn’t meet his eyes. While Ryan appeared completely oblivious to the social dynamics between Jesse, Alex, and their friends, Alex was quite sure that Ryan was aware of what was happening. He was confident that Ryan was delighted that not only had he triumphed over Alex, but that a wedge had been planted forcefully between Jesse and his friends.

Alex’s turn to sing came near the middle of the evening. He trotted up the stairs and stood before the microphone, facing the audience. He pulled the microphone from the stand, just as his music began.

Despite his fragile emotional state, despite the blackness that had enveloped his heart and was crushing his soul, Alex walked back and forth across the stage, playing to his audience. His friends, however, knew Alex’s behavior was a carefully crafted performance. His delivery belied his true feelings.

Unlike the other times he’d sung at The Ranch, however, he kept his eyes affixed to a random spot somewhere above or behind the audience. He never once looked at anyone in the audience, not at his friends, not at Jesse, and not at Ryan. If he had, he’d have seen a variety of emotions. Much of the audience seemed to enjoy the song which, despite the lyrics, was very upbeat. His friends’ expressions varied, from saddened, to concerned, to sympathetic, maybe even a little fearful. The expression on Jesse’s face was also one of concern. Ryan, who’d enjoyed the song, had both an evil grin and eyes that seemed to communicate great amusement. Clearly, he’d understood the message behind the song. Alex had surrendered, Ryan was the victor, and he was there to claim the spoils – Jesse.

As the song finished, Alex acknowledged the applause with a small wave, then walked off stage and directly out of the hall. He stepped out of the building to a small deck behind The Ranch. The sun had already set; the days were getting shorter and shorter, nearer now to summer’s end than its beginning. He leaned on the wooden railing at the edge of the deck, resting his forearms on the top rail, staring out as though admiring a beautiful vista or dazzling sunset, though in reality he was only looking across a darkened parking lot full of cars.

Alex had stood at the railing for no more than a minute when he felt a hand on his left shoulder. He glanced back to see Robbie. Turning back towards the parking lot, he saw with his peripheral vision that Andrew was standing to his right. “Hey, guys,” he muttered.

Robbie pulled his hand off Alex’s shoulder, then he and Andrew mimicked Alex, leaning up against the wooden railing with their forearms, one on either side of Alex. Nothing was said for a few moments. Andrew finally broke the silence. “So, you’re giving up, eh?”

“I know when I’ve been beaten,” replied Alex.

A brief silence, then Alex continued. “I guess I’m glad this happened now. Jesse was going to be moving in with me in just a couple weeks. Him going back to Ryan once we were living together, well, that would’ve been uncomfortable.” Both Andrew and Robbie nodded in agreement, solemn expressions on their faces.

“I’m thinking about maybe leaving Des Moines altogether.”

Robbie stood upright from his position leaning on the fence and turned toward Alex. With an aghast look on his face, he exclaimed, simply, “No!” Andrew’s eyes widened, but he remained silent.

“In the song I sang tonight, there’s a line about ‘not staying around to let him watch me die.’ I really don’t want to be around if it means seeing Jesse on a regular basis. You know, at the Y, at brunch, at The Ranch. One of my company’s clients offered me a job when I was unemployed. I’d turned him down, but maybe it might be the change I need. He said I could work remotely but would prefer it if I were to relocate to Southern California. Just think, you could come and see me come January or February. Get away from the cold and snow for a week or so.”

“But Alex, you can’t do that!” exclaimed Robbie.

“Why on earth not?” responded Alex. “What’s left for me here?”

“Uh, hello! Your friends, Alex,” Andrew quickly commented. “We’re all here.”

“And it’s not just us, either,” noted Robbie just as quickly. “You saw how many people showed up tonight. Every single one is here in solidarity with you. You do realize that, right?”

Andrew nodded in agreement, then added, “Jesse’s going to be the one on the outs. I think it’s going to take quite a while for everyone in our group to forgive him for this.”

“And, Alex,” said Robbie. “Just because we won’t have partners to switch off with, I’m pretty sure Andrew would be cool with a threesome from time to time.” Both Alex and Robbie glanced at Andrew. Despite the relative darkness of the deck, both noted that Andrew’s face had reddened noticeably. Robbie returned to his prior position, leaning on the railing.

“You know, Robbie, you’re the second person this evening to try and comfort me by offering me sex.”

“Who else offered?” asked Andrew.

“Who do you think?” was Alex’s quick response, though he felt guilty as soon as he spoke the words.

Andrew nodded in understanding, then with a hint of a smile on his face, he replied, “I guess that was a dumb question.”

The three remained quiet for several seconds before Alex said, “Robbie, question for you. “Have you told anyone about our occasional partner-swapping? And are you doing it with another couple? Just curious, that’s all.”

Andrew responded rather than Robbie. “No, we’ve not told anyone about it. Well, I haven’t, and I’m pretty sure Robbie hasn’t, either.”

“Nope,” said Robbie. “And since Kansas City, we’ve not considered asking any other couples, either.”

Alex smiled weakly. “You guys are great. The best.” he said.

Several seconds of silence hung between the three, before Alex spoke again. “You know, I really thought I’d gotten a second chance. A second chance to be myself and a second chance at love. I kind of thought it was a second chance for Jesse, too. You know, dating me rather than…him.” After another brief silence, Alex added sadly, “I guess Ryan’s the one who got the second chance, not me.”

Just then, inside the bar, Jesse got up and walked to Rhys. Rhys just gave Jesse a withering glare as Jesse squatted down on his haunches next to him. “What?” Rhys asked Jesse testily.

“Rhys, would you please find Alex and make sure he gets in here? I’m going to be singing after the woman walking up to the stage right now.”

“Let me get this straight, Jesse,” replied Rhys. “You want me to find Alex, then bring him in here so he can hear you sing?”

“Yeah, that’s what I just said, isn’t it?” Jesse asked. “Really, please. It’s important is here for my song. Very important. Imperative.”

Rhys gave Jesse a look of annoyance but capitulated. “I don’t know why you want him to see you sing. I think you’ve done enough to him already.”

Jesse gave Rhys a strange look. “I’m not clear what’s going on here, but I think I’m beginning to.” He then added, “I’d go find him myself, but I need to be here when my name is called.”

Rhys rose from his chair. Jesse put his hand on Rhys’ shoulder and said, “thanks, man. I owe you.”

Rhys shook his shoulder free of Jesse’s hand. He shook his head in disgust as he headed for the bar’s outer hallway.

Rhys glanced quickly around the hallway and lobby. Not seeing Alex, he decided to head to the deck. If Alex wasn’t there, he was sure to be in the men’s washroom. That or he’d left The Ranch altogether. Since Alex hadn’t driven, he thought that unlikely. Alex had confessed that he’d never taken an Uber, Des Moines’ mass transit offerings were woefully inadequate on Friday evenings, and it was much too far to walk home.

Rhys exited the building, and promptly saw Alex, flanked by Robbie and Andrew, the three staring off into a darkened parking lot as if they were at some scenic overlook. He stepped up behind Alex. “Alex? Jesse asked me to come and get you. He’s singing next. I don’t know why, but he says it’s imperative you’re there.”

Rhys saw Alex’s shoulders sag and his head fall forward. Robbie responded on Alex’s behalf. “Of all the nerve! Hasn’t he hurt Alex enough?”

Alex turned toward Robbie and reached out, placing his hand on Robbie’s left arm, hoping to calm Robbie’s sudden anger. “It’s okay, Robbie,” Alex said. “He’d told me it was important that I be here tonight to see him sing. Let’s go.”

The four returned to their seats. Before Alex sat, however, he locked eyes with Ryan. A wicked smile crept across Ryan’s face. ‘All that beauty can’t hide that he’s a self-centered, egotistical, pompous asshole,’ thought Alex. ‘How can Jesse not see what a horrible excuse for a human being Ryan is?’ Alex only broke eye contact with Ryan when he turned to sit down in his seat.

Jesse rose when the emcee introduced him as the final singer of the evening. Alex steeled himself, completely unsure of why Jesse found it so important that he be there. Suddenly, Alex felt Robbie’s right hand find his left. Seconds later, Alex felt Rhys, his neighbor to the right, grasp his right hand. In that moment, Alex thought to himself, “how could I possibly leave these people behind? I don’t think I’ve ever had the support of so many people…I can’t believe I was considering moving half a continent away from friends like these. Sometimes I guess I can be as big an asshole as Ryan.”

Once Jesse reached the microphone stand, he signaled that he was ready for the music to begin. Alex noted that Jesse then found Ryan in the audience. “Clearly, the song is going to be for him.” Alex glanced at Ryan, who was watching his man, a cocky smirk on his face.

Alex recognized the song as soon as the piano introduction began. He leaned to the right, muttering in Rhys’ ear, “Juice Newton. Nice choice.” Jesse then began to sing, softly, almost meekly, thought Alex.

‘Wait a minute,’ thought Alex. ‘This isn’t exactly a love song.’ He quickly glanced to Ryan, who still had a smile on his face. ‘Arrogant bastard,’ thought Alex. He then turned back towards the stage.

At this point, the song began to go off the rails. Jesse’s entire demeanor suddenly changed. His voice no longer sounded weak; quite the opposite, in fact. But what Alex noted more than Jesse’s voice was the look in his eyes. Jesse’s eyes, which Alex had always considered beautiful and full of life, had turned hard and dull. His eyes appeared to convey…what was it? Anger? Hate? Alex concluded that the look conveyed disgust. Contempt. Though Alex was unaware, his mouth had fallen open.

After singing these two lines, the song completely derailed. While the musical accompaniment continued to play, Jesse stopped singing. Instead, he began to speak. Speak with a venom that Alex was unaware Jesse was even capable of.

Alex then noted the expression on Jesse’s face. It had contorted from the face that Alex found beautiful into a withering sneer. Alex glanced towards Ryan. He was still smiling, but the smile was now clearly artificial. Alex saw Ryan begin to glance around the audience. ‘He’s beginning to look like a caged wild animal,’ thought Alex.

Alex turned back to Jesse, whose hands he noted were balled into fists. Jesse continued his diatribe.

Since the beginning of the song, Jesse’s eyes had not left Ryan. However, Ryan now seemed unsure of where he should look, glancing around the room nervously. He saw that many of the audience’s eyes were trained directly at him.

The entire audience by now knew what they were seeing was not someone simply sharing a song with a room of people on a Friday evening. At this point, it was barely even a song. Song or not, it carried a message. The singer’s message was to one individual person in the audience, and it was loud and clear. The message was an unequivocal, “Fuck you!”

As the song ended, Jesse’s voice once again softened as he managed to sing the last two lines of the song. However, the look on his face was still contorted into an ugly sneer of disgust and his glare was trained directly at Ryan.

If someone looked around as the song ended, they’d have seen more mouths hanging open among the audience than not. However, no one in the audience noticed, as everyone’s eyes were on one of two men, either Jesse or Ryan. There was no applause. The audience sat in stunned silence, realizing they’d just witnessed a breakup of epic proportions, the victim of which had been completely, utterly blindsided. Still, Jesse’s eyes remained on Ryan, where they’d been since the song had begun, now more than three minutes prior.

To Ryan’s credit, he had remained in his seat the entire time, receiving his just desserts. Once the song ended, however, he quickly rose from his seat and made his way through the crowd, his eyes fixed on the exit. Had he looked around, he’d have seen an entire roomful of eyes trained on him. And if he’d turned around, he’d have seen that Jesse continued to glare at him, only now with both arms extended forward and a single finger on each hand extended upward.

Once Ryan had exited the room, all eyes returned to Jesse. Jesse continued to stare at the door through which Ryan had left. He slowly lowered both of his arms, but then raised one hand to his chest, which was heaving as he gulped in large mouthfuls of air.

At some point, Alex had freed his right hand from Rhys’ left, and had placed it over his mouth, which still hung agape. Jesse then turned toward Alex. The two stared at one another, Alex still in complete disbelief. He did notice, however, that Jesse’s stone-cold, dead eyes softened when they finally fell on him. In a matter of seconds, Alex felt that he could see Jesse’s eyes sparkle. Then a smile slowly crept across Jesse’s face.

“Alex, get up here,” said Jesse.

Alex took his hand away from his mouth, only to point at himself. “Me?” he mouthed.

“Yes, you, you goof,” Jesse replied, laughing.

Alex remained in his seat, however, still in disbelief. Robbie pulled his hand from Alex’s, then gave Alex’s shoulder a shove. “You heard the man, Alex. Apparently, your boyfriend takes no prisoners. You’d better do what he says, or he’ll do you like he just did Ryan.” Several of the people at nearby tables laughed at Robbie’s comment.

Shaking, Alex slowly rose from his chair, then walked to the stairs and climbed onto the stage. A few people in the audience began to applaud and cheer.

Jesse opened his arms, welcoming Alex to him. The two embraced, and tears began to stream down Alex’s face. The audience realized that the two men were talking to one another, but their voices were soft and muffled. They were several feet from the microphone stand.

“Alex, I told you that you were going to love tonight.”

“When? I thought you’d broken up with me to return to Ryan.”

“What?” asked Jesse incredulously. “I told you I was going to show up with Ryan, as that would lull him into thinking everything was fine. I knew I wanted to pay him back a little bit for all the horrible things he did to me. And I figured that roasting him in front of an audience would really get to him. Plus, I think this way he knows that we are through.”

“But, but…” Alex stuttered, “…but you said you were back together…with…”

“Alex, did you listen to the messages I left? All of them?”

“Well, there was lots of noise when I listened to them in the airport…but the message came through loud and clear, even if all the words didn’t.”

Jesse laughed. “If you still have that voicemail, Alex, go back and listen to it again, okay?” Alex could only manage to nod in agreement.

Jesse continued, “And I got him to take me to Ruth’s Chris for dinner, too. I ordered the most expensive thing on the menu, and we ordered a bottle of the most expensive wine they had. I got the bastard to drop a pretty penny for the honor of one last meal with me.” Jesse chuckled. “He never saw it coming, did he?” he added.

Alex only managed to shake his head in reply.

Still in an embrace, they’d not heard the hooting and hollering that had begun in the audience. “I love you, Alex. More than anything.”

Again, Alex nodded, still finding it difficult to speak. After a few seconds, he managed to squeak, “I love you, too.”

Eventually, the audience’s comments began to seep through to the couple. They pulled back to look at one another when they heard someone yell, “Get a room, you two!”

Alex and Jesse both laughed. The two separated, then Alex reached out his hand for Jesse’s. “What do you say we head home?” he asked.

Jesse quickly responded, “Oh, no, no, no, Alex. We’re not done here yet, mister. Not by a long shot.”

Alex looked quizzically at Jesse as he took the hand Alex had offered, then motioned for Alex to give him his other hand. Alex did so, then Jesse backed up a few steps, so he was abreast of the microphone stand, Alex along for the ride. Alex watched as Jesse then gave an exaggerated nod, which turned out to be the cue for the emcee to start the next song. Jesse was going to sing not one, but two selections. “I figured I’d stick with Juice Newton,” he said under his breath as the musical introduction began.

Alex, who’d managed to shut off the waterworks briefly, began once again to weep as Jesse sang a song that he knew was for him and for him only. Despite the tears, though, Alex had a huge grin on his face. Throughout the entire song, Jesse held both of Alex’s hands, giving Alex no opportunity to wipe the tears from his cheeks.

Once the song concluded, Alex and Jesse again embraced. The audience applauded, cheered, and even made a few risqué comments, none of which were heard by either man.

“I love you, Jesse,” said Alex. Then, referencing one line in the song, he added, “You’re my sunshine and my rain, too, you know.”

“You don’t have to tell me, Alex, I already know. But please, feel free to tell me anyway, because it’s so wonderful to hear you say those words.”

Alex then pulled away from the embrace to wipe his eyes. The smile remained on his face, a smile which Jesse returned in kind.

After a few seconds, Alex was able to mutter, “So, Jesse, can we go home now? I really need to love on you.”

“No, Alex,” replied Jesse, smiling. “We can’t. Neither of us drove, and I’m pretty sure my ride has already left.”

“Then call an Uber, Jesse.”

“Alex, we’re still not done here.”

Alex gave Jesse a questioning look. He was in no way prepared for what happened next. Jesse quickly fished something out of his pants pocket, then got down on one knee. Alex’s eyes took in the sight, his hand suddenly over his mouth, which again was left agape.

“Alex, will you marry me?” was the simple question. Unable to speak, Alex gave a simple answer. He nodded. The audience, which had quieted down some, again began to applaud, cheer, and yell out a few off-color comments, louder than before. Neither Alex nor Jesse noticed.

Jesse slipped the ring onto Alex’s finger, then stood. The two embraced again, tears streaming down Alex’s face. Jesse leaned in close, so his mouth was directly next to Alex’s right ear. “Now I think it’s time to go home,” he said.

THE END